December 5, 2020

Troy Polamalu’s Hair Insured

Have you ever wondered how much Troy Polamalu’s hair is worth? I personally haven’t, but I have pontificated on how long it might take for him to wash and dry the over-sized French poodle that resides on his head. If you have actually speculated whether Troy’s locks were worth some scratch you don’t need to question anymore. Head and Shoulders has taken out a $1 million insurance policy from Lloyd’s of London for Polamalu’s hair. In reality Troy’s hair is actually worth more than a million because he has probably been paid quite well for his role in all of the Head and Shoulders commercials we are hearing/seeing these days.

While you might think the insurance policy is over the top this type of things happens all the time. Tom Jones chest hair is insured for $7 million, Heidi Klum’s legs $2.2 million, and Jennifer Lopez’s caboose is insured for an astounding $27 million.

Are You Ready to be a Raider?

Earlier this week Roger Goodell came down hard on Ben Roethlisberger by suspending him for six games based on his actions a month ago at a nightclub in Georgia. The suspension can be trimmed down to four games if he can actually keep his junk in his pants for a few months and stay out of trouble. The Steelers also acquired former backup QB Byron Leftwich earlier this week even though they already had Dennis Dixon and Charlie Batch on their roster. Finally, multiple outlets are reporting that Pittsburgh is calling teams with a top ten pick in the 2010 NFL Draft to gauge interest on a possible trade for Big Ben. To me there are just too many signals leading up to Roethlisberger getting shipped somewhere before the end of today.

So, where does he go? The Skins, Bucs and Lions more than likely aren’t interested in a quarterback because they have too many other gaps to fill. ESPN’s Adam Schefter reports the Steelers brass has contacted the Rams, 49ers, Browns, Jags, Raiders, Bills and Seahawks and the only ones that said “no” were the Rams and Bills. The Jags need to sell tickets very bad and how can they market the disaster that is Ben? The Seahawks could be a possibility with two picks and the 49ers and Bills need a quarterback, but I suspect they will go young if they go that route at all in the first round. There is also an outside shot the Browns would make a play for Ben since he is from Ohio and they have seven draft picks, but I think Holmgren is too sharp to give up all the youth they are can acquire in return for Roethlisberger.

I think the best bet for a trade is with the Al Davis led Oakland Raiders. They are the only front office stupid enough to give up what the Steelers are more than likely asking for in exchange for their two-time Super Bowl champion QB. Most of the talking heads think Roethlisberger will end up staying, but I think there have been entirely too many leaks if they were truly planning on keeping him. Al Davis has repeatedly made splashes in recent drafts by making outlandish moves and he will not disappoint this year. There is basically zero support in Pittsburgh these days and while that can change with time Ben is currently a public relations nightmare and a black eye the Steelers organization doesn’t deserve. It is now time for the Steelers to give Big Ben what he deserves. Ship his a$$ off to Oakland where he will fit in quite well with all the other degenerates.

Ugly Stat of the Year in the NFL

In case you didn’t hear last night the Cleveland Browns scored their first rushing touchdown of the season by a running back. Which means it took the Brownies over three months and their 13th game to push the ball across the plane into the end zone while running the ball. That is a revolting 49 meaningless quarters of aimlessly wandering around a football field and never succeeding in one of the most important goals of the game. Take all that into consideration and then factor in the Pittsburgh Steelers lost to Cleveland last night 13-6! This comes on the heels of a loss to Raider Nation the week before at Heinz Field. All Terrible Towels must be neatly folded and placed in the closet until the 2010 season.

One other little stat nugget. The Cleveland Browns quarterbacks have completed a TOTAL of 8 passes in their two wins this year. PUKE!

The Madden Curse Lives On

The Madden Curse has reared its ugly head again and it didn’t take long at all to happen. Troy Polamalu who divides the Madden 2010 cover with Larry Fitzgerald left the first game of the NFL season last night with a knee injury. Early reports indicate Polamalu sprained his MCL and could be out for 3-6 weeks. If you don’t recall who the curse has affected in recent years there is a list below to reference. If I were Larry Fitzgerald I would tread very lightly.

2001: Eddie George No injury.
2002: Daunte Culpepper Missed five games and played poorly.
2003: Marshall Faulk Missed six games plus he never ran for 1,000 yards again.
2004: Michael Vick Broke his leg, missed 11 games.
2005: Ray Lewis Missed only one game.
2006: Donovan McNabb Missed last seven games of the season.
2007: Shaun Alexander Broke his foot, missed six games.
2008: Vince Young Missed only one game, but his season wasn’t pretty
2009: Brett Favre Missed no games, but should have due to a torn bicep
2010: Troy Polamalu Out 3-6 weeks with a knee injury.
2010: Larry Fitzgerald TBD.